The Weakness In Me
by Sissa
Summary: Jealousy is a dangerous feeling.


"What the hell was that?!" The girl hissed at her girlfriend. Her usually calm and loving eyes were now full of a mixture of hurt and anger; her chin trembling as she tried to hold back the tears in her eyes.

"What?" The confused girl asked, surprised at her girlfriend's sudden behavior.

The other girl's eyes widened as if she couldn't believe her own ears. "Are you serious? You were hitting on that girl!" The pain was evident in her words as she raised her voice, all the while pointing at the girl in the red dress who was staring at them unabashedly; completely satisfied with herself.

Now even more confused she shook her head. "No, I wasn't. I was just being nice to her."

The angry girl frowned in annoyance, "If this is your way of being _nice_," she literally hissed the last word, "feel free to continue. But without me." With that she turned around and left her girlfriend standing alone in the crowded Chulos wondering what the hell just happened.

Her heart told her that she should chase after the mad girl, but her mind told her that she didn't do anything wrong and she should just let her girlfriend calm down. She slumped down and sighed on the closest chair she could find and, lost in her thoughts, sipped from her drink.

"Can I join you?" A soft voice interrupted her thoughts. Glancing up she spotted the girl who caused all of the ridiculous and pointless drama. Before she could even answer her, the blonde in the red dress settled in the chair right next to her. "I saw your girlfriend leave. Did something happen?" She asked with curious brown eyes.

"No, everything is perfectly fine," she replied sarcastically hoping the blonde girl got a clue and left her alone. She was sure that her girlfriend wouldn't be happy if she came back to find her anywhere near that girl again.

The stranger moved a bit closer; placing a delicate hand on the girl's that was still wrapped around her glass. "Are you sure? I'm a good listener."

Quickly, she moved her hand away and for the first time fully directed her attention towards the unwanted stranger. "I have a girlfriend," she said sternly not breaking the eye contact. "So would you please be so kind and just leave me alone? I'm not interested."

As she glared at her the stranger's expression changed within a second, her face now hard and cold; and all her pretty features were gone. She stood up without a single word and finally left the girl alone, contemptuously curling up her pink lips.

The girl shook her head in disbelief over the last few minutes. "What the fuck am I still doing here?" She asked herself finally standing up to follow her girlfriend out the door in the hope that she can find her.

And she does.

Her girlfriend was sitting on the stairs outside of the club talking to their friend Timo. She moved toward them desperately wanting to explain herself; to talk to the love of her life and make everything all right, but something made her stop her movements and freeze.

She knew the two couldn't see her as she was standing behind their backs and far enough away to go unnoticed. She stopped because she spotted a foreign looking cigarette in her girlfriend's hand. She stopped because she noticed that Timo's hand was on her girlfriend's thigh and she stopped because she also noticed the boy was sitting too close to the girl's body for her taste.

An unfamiliar feeling hit her body, forcefully. She watched the pair with a cold stare, suddenly having a desire to hit the boy hard in the face or to break the hand that was lazily lying on her girlfriend's delicate thigh. She was baffled over her own thoughts at first; she had never experienced this unwanted feeling before. It was new and she was confused even though she knew she was in love. She just never thought she would be one of those jealous girls.

Her eyes darkened from anger as she watched her girlfriend snuggle up to the boy as he placed a comforting arm around her shoulders. She knew that she should go over there and stop this bullshit but something was holding her back. She watched the girl that she loves draw slowly on the cigarette. Seeing this made her features suddenly soften and her lips curl up in a small smile. Even though her girlfriend attempted to play a badass, she never could be. That's what she loves about her; along with so many other things.

She became annoyed when she realized that she was standing too far away to hear what they were quietly talking about.

Suddenly, Timo stood up causing her features to once again harden as she watched him give a gentle kiss on her girl's forehead. He caught sight of her standing there, confusion and curiosity written all over his pretty face. "Hey," he spoke up while she searched his face for any sign of guilt. She finds nothing which only confused her more. He must know that she saw it all.

She gave him a small nod. "Timo." Then turned her head towards the girl's silhouette still sitting on the stairs, waiting for her to move but it was in vain. She didn't move, she just silently sat there smoking her cigarette.

Timo followed her stare and then looked back with a sigh. "I'll leave you two alone."

He vanished back inside the club knowing that those two were madly in love with each other, but that sometimes jealousy could be stronger than either one of them. Timo had never been blind to it; he knew them both too well. When he had come outside to sneak a smoke, since Luzi hates when he smokes, he had immediately known that something was wrong when he found one of his best friends sitting alone on the stairs lost in her thoughts.

Timo hadn't even thought about it when he sat down next to her and without any meaningless words offered her a cigarette. He hadn't really thought she would accept it since he's never seen her smoking before.

"Thanks."

He nodded as he lit his own cigarette along with hers. They sat there in silence, neither of them saying a word. Just smoking their cigarettes until Timo turned his head towards his friend, and saw a single tear slowly making its way along her cheek. He raised an eyebrow and soothingly placed his hand on her thigh. "You want to talk about it?"

She only shook her head because she felt like there was nothing to talk about.

"Are you sure? Either you'll bore me with your story or I'll bore you with mine. You choose," he winked at her.

She let out a small laugh and thought that maybe it would do her good if she talked to someone.

"Relationships suck," she finally said even though she didn't really mean it. She just felt hurt when she had seen her girlfriend and that stupid girl dancing not so innocently together and then talking to each other which didn't look very innocent to her either.

Timo exhaled. "No kidding. And you just found out that now? Well, congrats then. About time."

"Do they really?" She asked sadly. She was so deeply in love with her girlfriend, but this jealousy was overwhelming her in a way that scared her. She never experienced something like this before and the feelings freaked her out sometimes. She knew that she had overreacted earlier, but she couldn't help it. She sighed in frustration. She was never really good at sharing.

Timo saw the sadness in her pretty face. "I don't know. Sometimes they do. Sometimes they don't." He paused briefly. "Was the fight bad?"

She frowned at the question and snuggled up closer to him, silently begging him to stop asking questions. Timo gently put his arm around her shoulders and immediately understood. She didn't want to talk. She was too confused of her own feelings and all she needed was him being there for her. And he knew that.

"Love is confusing. Always has been, always will be. I don't get it either why we always have to suffer when we are in love, but I guess that's life?" Timo exhaled again and looked down at the girl. "I gotta go, Luzi will be pissed off soon," he laughed to himself. "Will you be okay here or do you want me to give you a ride home?"

She shook her head. "No, it's okay. Go find your girl. I feel like walking tonight."

"Okay." Timo leaned in and, before he stood up, gave her a soft kiss on the forehead. "You two will be okay, trust me. She loves you." She slowly nodded, fully aware of the truth in his words.

Timo was somewhat surprised when he turned and saw the person who had caused all of this. "Hey."

She glared at him as he stood there and he couldn't figure out what the reason why. "Timo." She moved her eyes from him to her girlfriend and he followed her stare. She wanted to talk to her, it was obvious but the other girl still ignored her. Timo sighed. Those two needed to talk to each other desperately. "I'll leave you two alone."

She stood there for what felt like forever not really knowing what she should do. Her girlfriend was still ignoring her, but she decided to just screw it and slowly moved towards the girl until she was standing right behind her. "Can I sit down?"

The girl below her shrugged as if she didn't even care. Taking that as a yes she carefully placed her body right next to the smoking girl making sure that they didn't touch. "Cigarettes aren't good for you."

She received another silent shrug, so she forcibly took the cigarette away and stubbed it out. Then she searched her pocket, found a stick of gum and offered it to the girl sitting next to her.

"Thanks."

"Nothing happened between me and her," she started, nervously shifting her feet.

"I know."

One perfect eyebrow raised in confusion. "You know? What was that about then?"

The younger girl let out a deep breath as she whispered, "You scare me."

"What?" She returned with a shake of her head in absolute confusion.

Her girlfriend looked over at her for the first time and sadly smiled. "You heard me, you scare me. This," she motioned between them, "scares me. The thought of losing you scares me."

The older girl wanted to interrupt but was quickly silenced. "Don't, please. If I don't say it now, I won't say it at all." Once she saw a nod of acknowledgment she continued. "I'd lie if I said that I've never been in love before. But this with us…. it's different. I know I overreacted back there, but it was stronger than me. I don't want to share you, in any way."

The other girl laughed quietly. "You've never been good at sharing."

Jokingly, her girlfriend gave her a gentle punch and suddenly her smile wasn't so sad anymore. "And that from someone who wanted to kill Timo just a few minutes ago."

The girl's features once again became serious. "How do you know? You couldn't see us."

The younger girl frowned. "Oh please, I know you better than you know yourself. Hearing you saying his name was enough for me."

She blushed knowing that she got caught.

"No need to be embarrassed, it was actually cute," the girl winked at her. She then grew serious. "Why are we doing this to each other? We should stop with this pointless fighting, it hurts us both."

"Maybe because love always hurts? But sometimes it's a good hurt, like in our case. I don't want to ever experience a bad hurt with you." The younger girl nodded and looked in front of her suddenly lost in her own thoughts.

"What are you thinking of?"

"Stuff."

"What stuff?"

She didn't answer, just turned her head and, in a quick movement, crashed her lips against the lips of her lover. The surprised girl didn't wait a second before she was returning the fierce kiss, hungrily attacking the sweet lips of the younger girl.

"Emma wait," Jenny finally stops her and she softly pushes her away.

Her girlfriend looked at her in confusion. "What?"

The brunette glanced around her. "I don't think this is the best place," she said honestly but Emma gave her a mischievous wink, took her hand and pulled Jenny up with her. "Where are we going?"

Emma didn't answer, instead she dragged the taller girl behind the club where nobody would interrupt them and pushed her girlfriend against the wall. "Are you serious? I never thought you'd be so wild," Jenny said in surprise while watching Emma remove the gum from her mouth and throw it on the ground. "Not that I mind," she smirked and pulls Emma closer crashing their lips together again.

Jenny slowly traced Emma's bottom lip with her tongue, begging for entrance and the blonde girl never resisted as her mouth opened a bit more to give full access. It was a hard, passionate kiss without any sign of the sweet loving kiss that was their norm. It was a kiss of pure want.

Finally they parted breathless; breathing heavily with their foreheads touching. "I want you. I want you now and I want you here," Emma said hoarsely and Jenny could see her eyes were darkened with passion.

"Okay," was all Jenny managed to say before she took the blonde's lips between her own again in a deep kiss, this time pushing her tongue inside without asking for permission. She could tell it surprised Emma but she immediately obeys and their tongues fought for dominance, neither of them seems to be winning this game of love.

She felt Emma's body gently push into her trying to be as close as possible and when she feels the cold wall against her back, she doesn't mind. Especially not when Emma breaks the kiss and places her lips on Jenny's bare neck softly nibbling on the exposed skin. She can't help but let out a loud moan and feel Emma smile because her girlfriend knows just how sensitive her neck is.

"Shhh," Emma whispers in her ear which made her moan quietly once more. She feels Emma smile again. "Someone could hear us and we don't want that, do we?" Her girlfriend asks while gently sucking and biting on her sensitive ear.

"Nuh huh," is all Jenny manages to mumble thinking they should fight more if she's going to get this after every fight. And this is just a beginning.

Emma placed both of her hands under Jenny's t-shirt, her wet lips returned to the exposed neck leaving red marks. They both knew they should be careful with marks on the neck but at that moment they didn't care about anything but the feeling of being close to each other. She felt Emma's warm hands on her bare stomach slowly but surely make their way higher until they finally found what they were looking for.

Suddenly they were interrupted by the sound of music. They froze for a second, scared of what was going on but then realized it was just the loud music coming from open windows of Chulos. They laugh when they hear the first tones of the song they're playing.

_Let me be your hero._

"Seriously? Are they just playing the cheesiest song ever?" Jenny laughed quietly while leaving soft kisses on Emma's shoulder.

Emma looked at her. "What? You don't like it?" She smiled, whispering words into Jenny's ear along with the song. "_Would you tremble if I touched your lips?__" _She sang, letting her fingers trace their way along Jenny's bottom lip. She smiled again when she heard Jenny gulp and lick her lips. _"__Would you swear that you'll always be mine?__" _She felt Jenny's breathing hitch, so she continued. _"__I don't care, you're here tonight.__"_ Then she whispered the final lyrics. "_I can be your hero, baby_."

They stayed quiet for what seemed like forever, neither of them saying a word. The only thing Emma could hear while her lips were that close to Jenny's ear was her girlfriend's heavy breathing. Then before she could even protest, she felt herself being pressed against the wall in one quick movement; her girlfriend unable to wait immediately attacking her lips with hot passionate kisses.

"I want to feel you," Jenny murmured hoarsely in between the kisses, her hands tracing down Emma's body until they reached her belt. "God, I need to feel you," she growled before she unbuckled her belt and pulled down the zip never leaving Emma's sweet lips. Emma quietly moaned when Jenny finally put her hand in her jeans groaning into the kiss when she felt the wetness through Emma's underwear. Their breaths quickened every second, their kisses getting more and more passionate and it felt like there was no space left between their bodies when Jenny decided to put the underwear aside and finally place her hand on the place where her girlfriend needed her the most.

Emma groaned and laid her head against the wall while Jenny's fingers teased her. "Don't tease," she managed to say and grab Jenny around her neck to connect their lips again. Her girlfriend obediently obeyed and it was Emma's breathing that hitched now when Jenny slipped two of her long slim fingers inside of her body and immediately started doing what she knows best, her thumb never leaving Emma's most aching place. Emma's moaning between the kisses grew louder every second and she almost screamed when Jenny finally got her over the edge, tightly holding her when her knees refused to work.

"I've got you," she whispered into Emma's ear as she took her hand from the jeans, so she could hold her tighter. She smiled as she slowly moved Emma's sweaty hair from her forehead and gently kissed it. "You're my weakness, do you know that? I can't help being jealous when it comes to you. You're mine. Only mine," she said looking deeply into Emma's dark eyes.

Emma smiled with a tired but happy smile. "I know."

They both knew that even if the jealousy was sometimes stronger than them, it was okay. It was okay because they belong to each other and nothing and no one can change that.


End file.
